Tuesday, July 10, 2012
On Being a BoHo Mommy
I am a bit of an odd ball mom. I borrow from many different parenting styles and create my own form of motherhood...one that involves no shoes, lots of bare bums, letting my child climb things that "aren't safe" and generaly just trying to not stress about Claire's development. I'm a BoHo Mom. Or at least that is what I have dubbed myself. Some may say I follow "attachment parenting" but in fact I don't really. I don't co-sleep, and have dabbled in some sleep training (I'm sorry but waking EVERY HOUR on the HOUR was making me mental). I just don't like how black and white parenting has become. Or breastfeeding for that matter. You HAVE to do it this way or you are failing as a parent. Puh-lease. Life doesn't work that way. Life is full of COLORS, life is a rainbow; and parenting is an adventure. Why does motherhood have to be an all or nothing scenario?
I am currently typing this as I sit with a cold glass of wine (ooooohhhhh bad mommy) as I watch Claire play naked, totaly bucky. She has already peed on the floor once, no biggie. We got her potty and I put it down beside her. I watch her for cue's and when I think she needs to go we hop on the potty. It's a loose version of Elimination Communication and it works well for us. She goes potty 2-3 times a day and is barely 14 months old. I have been told "it's too early" I am going to "damage her kidneys" that I am "rushing her". All I care about is her having a positive association with the potty...not if I am following what some book says I should be doing.
Shoes. Don't even get me started on shoes. I am a firm believer that shoes hinder a childs ability to learn how to walk, to learn at their own pace that is. Children all over the world learn to walk without shoes, and they do just fine. What is it with our obsession about SHOES on a babies feet??? WHY? When a child takes those initial steps without shoes they can use there toes and flex their arches, finding their own balance. A child should feel the earth beneath their feet, the grass between their toes. Yes, there are times when it is not safe to be barefoot. But I get flak ALL THE TIME for this. Claire is doing just fine with her barefoot tootsies thank you very much! Daddy and I go barefoot all summer long, it's a family affair.
Claire's face is often messy, I let her choose her own clothes (yes at 13.5 months she has preferences) and I let her climb things that would make some moms faint. I watch her of course!!!!!! I do the climbing with her, she gets stuck, learns she cant get down, but I DONT do it for her. I let her solve her own problems. I feel she will learn what she is and isn't capable of, she will learn problem solving and cause and affect.
The process of becoming a mother, raising a child, watching her thrive, and learning to let her explore and grow on her own has also changed ME! It has given me the courage to let my true self out to play. My bohemian, laid back, low maintenance, hippy dippy self. I make more art, I follow the moon again, I am learning all about the healing powers of gemstones, I'm eating healthier food, I breathe, dance, smile, sing, and let my inner child out to play more. Or at least I try. Having the courage to let my child explore has given me the courage to explore my own life.
peace, love, and pickles