Monday, April 25, 2011

Motherhood Monday: 34 Weeks

As some of you may have read in this post, I recently went for a second ultrasound to see if my placenta had moved enough to allow me to birth naturally. Unfortunately it still has to move more, it moved 1 cm but needs to be a minimum of 2 cm away before I can safely birth vaginally. The news was utterly DEVASTATING. I was sure that it had moved enough, positive. When the technician told me 1 cm I didn't believe her. I thought she didn't know what she was talking about, my midwife will tell me everything is ok.....well the midwife just confirmed that 1cm is not enough. The fear is that as my cervix dilates, it could rip off the edge of my placenta causing me to bleed out. Not good for me, or baby. So I have to go back for another scan at 36 weeks to see if it has moved more, if not then I am refereed to an OB and if it is then ultimately their call. If they feel it is too dangerous then I am scheduled for a planned cesarean. This is not a part of my birth plan!!!

See I plan to do a natural birth, with a midwife, in my local hospital. I am very lucky in that Lions Gate hospital is natural birth/midwife friendly. I am not naive and know that things can quickly change during labor, but I have no intention of using any form of unnecessary medical interventions: no epidural, no drugs, no elective Cesarean. No judgement AT ALL against those that choose to use things things, but it is simply not what I desire out of my birthing experience. I view birth as a right of passage, a war that women go through and come out the other side....victorious mothers with their proud babe in their arms. The one and only birth I have ever seen was a natural home birth, and it changed my life. For the better!

So right now it is all a waiting game. Will my placenta move? Will it not? It is so unbelievable frustrating to not be able to do a damn thing about this! I have no control what so ever, and as a fairly obsessive personality type....this is DRIVING ME INSANE! So please dear readers, send positive vibes my way and say a prayer to whatever you believe in that my placenta will move and move WAY OUT OF THE WAY!

As frustrating as it is, and as crushed as I will feel if my birth plan does not go according to plan I also realize I have to pause and give thanks. Thanks for living in a country that has a medical system that I do not have to pay for, for a midwife that cares and is doing all she can to help me, for the technology that can save my life and that of my child's....after all not all women are so lucky:

I have become a complete and utter BIRTH JUNKIE! I cant stop reading about birth, learning about birth, talking about birth....I am obsessed! Although lately I must admit I have taken a break from reading about birth and have been focusing on pregnancy in general and breastfeeding....because I get so sad at the thought of not going through the labor process. (You may think I am nuts, but the hormones released by a naturally progressing labor are so good for both mother and child!). But here I am, a self proclaimed birth junkie. All of my passion for womens rights, the years of womens studies I did in college and university has found a home, an outlet: EMPOWERED PREGNANCY, BIRTH, AND BREASTFEEDING!

In other news the ultrasound reveled that the Bug is developing at a gloriously healthy and steady rate! Growth is bang on with the wee one weighing at about 4.3 pounds so far as of last week. Oi vey, when I think of it that way I realize I have anywhere from 2-4 more pounds of baby (possibly more!) to fit in my belly....FOR CEREAL!?!?! I feel jammed full as it is! The bug is still moving lots, I actually laughed when the midwife asked if I was doing kick counts. I simply don't have to, this kid lets me know they are there! It is more rolling and twisting that I feel now as the bug is running out of room, but my whole tummy will lurch and twist as the bug rolls over to the point that you can see it from across the room. Its pretty amazing, and painful at times. Ive had a foot stuck in my ribcage on more then one occasion.

Sleep still sucks, and working is getting more difficult as my energy levels start to crash....pants are like a medieval torture device and my bladder screams at me after 30 minutes. I live for 5pm when I can head for home and put on comfy and baggy pants. My baby shower is this coming weekend and I am SUPER DUPER excited!!!!!!! I love any reason to gather a bunch of ladies together, such moments are so precious!

PS: if you havent already, don't forget to click below and vote for this blog on Top Baby Blogs! If you have done so already the Bug and I send big BIG hugs!

Peace, Love, and Pickles!

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  1. FOR CEREAL!! lol. You are absolutely glowing in your pic, you look great. And I really really really hope your placenta moves :) {Ha I've never said that to anyone before}

  2. Hey sweetie :) I was reading through this post, and I just have to say-even if your birth plan doesn't go quite as planned, it will still be a remarkable experience. And your bug will still be the apple of your eye. My second child blew any birth plans I'd ever had by coming feet first six weeks early, resulting in an emergency cesearean and a baby coming home to an empty nursery. It was a nightmare. That baby is now eight years old, and we just look back and laugh! So hang in there sweetie, and remember: While it might not be quite what you planned, it's just a moment. A moment in time that's going to give you lots and lots of little moments that aren't going to go as planned (because let's face it, with kids they never do) but are still going to be some of the greatest moments of your life.

  3. Thanks love, that comment meant a lot to me xo